IJCentral: International Justice Central

Dear Thomas,

Thanks for your letter. I would have written back earlier, but I’ve kind of been on the move lately. I did find the time to read the Rome Statute that you sent me though. Very interesting, but let me just say, whoever wrote that thing is a real killjoy.
Thanks too for being so welcoming, but I’m afraid you’ve got it all wrong. I’d love to come and visit you in The Hague, but I’m headed for sunnier shores, Venezuela perhaps (I wrote to Hugo and I’m waiting to hear back), or Cuba if they’ll have me. There’s talk of Niger putting me up. The Mrs. is on vacation in Algeria right now, but she sends her regards.
Death to all infidel drug addict rebel sewer rats!
Excuse me, a little outburst of rage there. I’m afraid it can’t be helped someti – Europeans your cities will burn, burn I tell you – sorry about that. I’m under a fair bit of stress lately. 
I heard they completed your trial and I had a thought about your little ICC predicament. Have you tried throwing money at the situation? Literally, I mean. Like leaning out of the window of a moving vehicle and chucking it at people. I did that once and got crowned King of Kings – which was nice.
Send my best to the other guys. What’s the wardrobe like there btw? Just in case, you know. I’m quite fond of a colorful throw, and the thought of sober prison garb is rather terrifying. If all goes really wrong I’ll give Tony or Silvio a call. They’re my friends, at least they were last time I checked.

Lots of love,

Muammar